Thursday, September 23, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

yes, I's not Wednesday anymore but I didn't have a chance to update yesterday.

I've been sick with a cough/runny nose/sore throat/headache for a week now. My little girl and husband both have it. We've just been a ball of snot around here. I thought I was on the mend Sunday but I woke up feeling worse than ever on Monday. Yuck. It's for the birds. Sickness combined with my daughter's refusal (mostly due to coughing while laying flat) to nap lead to a very occupied yesterday. I'm going to the Dr's this morning so I thought I would take a minute to update.

Being sick for an entire week has not given me the golden opportunity for exercise. I set my alarm last Wednesday for 5:30 a.m. with my running shoes, Ipod and jogging clothes laid out. I woke up at 5:30 a.m., not to run, however, but to down the coldest beverage I could find and pop a throat lozenge in my mouth. This past week has only allowed me to exercise once: a 3 mile walk in which the entire last half was spent hacking up my lung. If you drive by I'm sure it's still laying on the side of the road.

Barely any exercise combined with a loss of appetite (the ONE good thing about being sick) has led to a loss of....drumroll, please....

3 pounds!

While I have been conscious of my food intake and purposefully making better decisions, I didn't anticipate such a loss with ONLY my diet changing and NO exercise. Huh. Dually noted.

Well, I'm off the to the Docs. Hopefully I will recover from this funk and get my butt moving again soon. :)

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in/Sabotage

Monday's post on freedom came a week late. I never "recovered" from vacation. In fact, my weight has increased, yet again, by

:wait for it:
+.4 pounds.

My action plan now? Stop talking and start doing! I make such great plans in my mind and create these goals that, when I don't achieve them, plunge me into a deep pit of self-pity and failure. I have yet to grasp the concept of picking myself up again. I start the race (weight loss journey) with a BANG! ...then fall...then stumble..crawl..lay there for awhile until I am utterly fed up with myself (and the amount of weight I've gained back after I fell in the first place) and I get back up again and...well, just refer to the start of the race.


I have been reflecting on this past summer and a word for this weight loss journey/quest to be healthy/"stop eating & start moving you goober tard" journey came to mind.


Consequently the song by the same name (Beastie Boys) has been stuck in my head, too. I just familiarized myself with the lyrics and they aren't 'PG' so beware if you listen to it.

Spring was great. I lost the bulk of the 30 pounds in spring. Jogging became enjoyable doable, and my longest jogging time peaked at 25 minutes. I still ate a lot of what I wanted, but I balanced it out with veggies, fruit and water. BUT Summer is another story. It's not even in the same book as Spring, that's how night and day these seasons have been for me in regards to weight-loss. The end result of summer is a weight gain of about 8-9 pounds and me jogging only a hand full of times. I let go of my grip on reality and decided not to care. Wow. How horrible is that written down in plain black and white? I sabotaged my previous efforts.

I have nothing further to write about it, however. I just thought I'd share the word that came to mind when I thought of summer.

Oh, who am I kidding? I do have one further thing to say and it can be summed up in one word also:


Sunday, September 12, 2010


Can I just say how I've been feeling?

Like a failure.

This past week my 2 year old was sick and therefore kept me up at all odd hours of the night. Not joking. Sometimes I was up at EVERY odd numbered hour of the night with her. My priority was not what went into my body. Each bite was a conscious decision and I chose to eat what I knew my mind wanted not what my body needed. Do you understand me? My sleep deprived, food addicted mind wanted sugar, which it associates with comfort, while my body was pleading for fuel to combat the fatigue and renew me.

We've been in Hebrews 12 for the last 2 Sundays. "...let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.." This verse is meant to be figurative but to me holds such a literal meaning. My sin is my weight-my lack of self control-my addiction and lust for food. I've struggled with it for so long and every time I "lay it aside" I turn around and, for whatever reason, pick it back up again. It is my "sin which so easily ensnares".

I've prayed for freedom. But what is freedom? And how am I truly expecting to see it? What examples of God's greatness am I going to use to TRUST that He is fully capable and willing to free me?

The Cross.

Oh, the cross. The wonderful cross. What happened at the cross? Jesus paid ALL debts of sin. ALL SIN! Including reoccurring ones. God became man and sacrificed Himself...

But it doesn't stop there. Oh, no.

The Grave.

God became man and sacrificed himself for my freedom. He paid my debt on the cross and he DEFEATED MY SIN, YOUR SIN AND DEATH when He rose again! He has the victory over sin! He has already CONQUERED this sin that I keep picking back up, if only I would just lay it down and leave it. He purchased my freedom on the cross and obliterated the power of sin by rising again.

I never really understood, the way I do right now, the POWER that came with the resurrection ...the power over death and sin-the power over my ensnaring sin.

Straight from my journal: Sin has no power where Jesus is. Jesus conquered the grave and the thing that leads to death-sin! Because Jesus has already bought my freedom with His blood am I, through Him, going to be able to conquer this. There is freedom!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Homekeeper's Journal: Home

My kitchen would be more inviting if ………….it was CLEAN! Dishes are like the thing that never goes away. There always seem to be a pile of dirty dishes, no matter how many times I wash them. I also would love to see more greenery in my kitchen.

My best tip for making a home seem more welcoming ….. sad, but I don't know that I have any "best tips". I suppose my best tip would be to wear a smile. Your attitude and personality make up a home--what's more welcoming than a smile?

To give the feeling of warmth in my home I often ….. crank up the heat. HA! I guess I don't really give the *feeling* of warmth, I just give warmth! I also like all sorts of scented candles (peppermint, apple pie, pumpkin pie, coffee)

In the cooler months, it is essential for me to ….. wear fun, cozy socks! Winter is great through the first snow but after that I'm ready to see green again. Little things like fun socks, festive undies (oh yeah, I went there) and lots of scarves are necessary to my sanity. Plus, when your feet are covered in plush frogs it's easier to forget about the joy of flip-flops.

Some favorite Autumn/Winter recipes are ….. pumpkin roll, veggie chili, loaded baked potatoes, chicken and dumplins, clam chowder, chocolate chip cookies, banana bread, lasagna...pretty much anything warm and, potentially, gooey

A Quick Tip for making your house more inviting …… pull back the curtains and let in the natural sunlight. To me, pulling back the curtains is like having an ever changing landscape canvas right in your room.

To join in go here: Christian Homekeeper's Network
Sorry for the lack of weigh in this week and last. Vacation was last week (woot!) and I've got a super sick little girl at home so I'm focusing on her...that and I *jumped*, not fell, off the wagon again :(

I'm just having a bit of a hard time staying on the wagon..and staying motivated. But I don't want to depress or drag anyone else down so I'll leave it at that.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

Here's the Wednesday Weigh-in and, yes, I know it's actually Thursday but I've been having technical difficulties.

After a week of mild to moderate exercise and a very flexible diet I have a deficit of 2.8 pounds! Woot woot!

My healthy eating started off great and then the weekend came. I found myself out of the house a ton more than during the week and I didn't make the smartest decisions, but the out of the house walking seemed to balance out.

Exercising wasn't as productive as I wanted it to be. I walked 3 miles 4 days this week and my 'Yoga Meltdown' 2 times. However, now that the weather seems to be cooler in the morning (YAY!!) I plan on running again. SQUEEEEE!!!

Sorry this is so short today. I need to get the house in order b/c we have a sweet, little 7 month old girl hanging out with us. Liesl will get her wish fulfillment of a baby sister for a few short hours today :)

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

The saying is true, "You reap what you sow." Rather than beat around the bush, I'm just going to fess up. My weight loss this week?


I'm trying to be honest and hold myself accountable for any losses or gains that happen. I'm still trying to get back into the groove of working out and watching what I eat (ha! obviously!). For the past 2 months I "gave up" and walked occasionally, didn't run at all, didn't do one single workout dvd AND ate whatever-the-fat I wanted. Am I ashamed of the past 2-3 months? Yes. Terribly ashamed. So ashamed I couldn't blog about it. I would sit and write and write and write and then...delete.

This whole weight loss thing is something I've struggled with all my life, but I am learning that it is a journey. I can't just quit! If I were to quit on my diet and health, it would be quitting on life. Seriously.

If I haven't talked about it before I am going to mention it now. I'm pretty sure that there is such thing as a sugar addiction. And I'm also pretty sure that I've got it. :/ Diet is going to be my focus. Exercising will come when the weather becomes more tolerable--I do have such a passion for running that I can't wait to lace up my shoes and hit the pavement. But diet is an ongoing battle for me. More than just my "diet" is sugar.

I was successful on the Daniel Fast for about 10 days. I followed the diet/fast, but didn't embrace the spiritual fast. I'm not going to do this again because I think going cold turkey on all of these foods may have led me to binge in the end. I am going to attempt a dairy-reduced, sugar-reduced diet this coming week. I will update honestly on how it goes.

I must come back to this week, however. I am proud of myself because I do think that taking the first step is always the hardest.I did take that first step...again. My butt was served last night when I, for the first time in 3 months, put in a workout dvd and stretched, pulled, twisted, flexed and bent to Jillian Michael's 'Yoga Meltdown'. I also did it today during my toddler's naptime AND went for a walk 2 mile walk when she went to sleep.

Truly, though, I was scared to do it last night. I feared the length of the video, my out-of-shapeness, the impending post-workout soreness and not being able to finish it. I did finish (struggle through) it, I AM sore today but you know what???

I am glad I did it.

Exercising yesterday made exercising today easier. I was super sore but I knew what to expect and knew that I could get through it. I am just glad to have that "first workout" behind me. And, hey, if I can do it weighing #!@&* pounds...

so. can. you.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday Five: Happy Things

This morning I went for a walk, read, ate breakfast, read some more, perused the internet and knitted all before my dear little 2 year old woke up. It put me in good spirits. That's why I decided for the 'Friday Five' to list some things that make me happy.

Fun Mugs
Not fun "people" mugs, although those definitely have their place, but real mugs. Coffee Mugs. Oh yes, I am one of those people that would have mugs hanging from every cabinet in the kitchen. Sad to say, we don't go thrift storing or antiquing much so I don't have many. Maybe 3.

Hair Products
Mainly waxes and pomades. Gels, mousses and hairspray are okay but I love hair putty. It's gooey, messy and smells deli-sh. It's like play-dough for your hair. What's not to love?

Children's Poetry Until recently Michael and I have been reading storybooks, fiction and non, nursery rhymes, picture books, ABC books and, well, everything but poetry. I picked up a couple children's poetry collections from the library and was hooked. They are so much fun to read and make great partners with other storybooks. I have to read them at naptime and bedtime, no matter what other books get read.

Some women love shoes. Others love purses. Me? I love yarn. Yarn is like the promise of a new adventure. It's a colorful, multi-textured project a couple of needles away. Whether I'm working on a knitting project or not, I still keep a basket atop the shelf in our living room. Just to look at.

Moody Toddler
Even at her grumpiest, I find happiness in this little miracle. She's a joy to watch grow. Some moms say they want to slow down time when their kids are babies but not me. Nope, I like this age. She's just the right mix of "I do it I-self" and "I want to hold you" (which is her way of saying," I want you to hold me").

What's your "happy thing"?

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

I've been sick. Nothing major. Just your normal sniffles/cough/congestion/tired/voice losing, head cold. It has wiped me out this week, however, and ruined any and all plans I had of resuming my workout schedule.

I weighed in this morning and, no shocker here, I have a gain of 6 pounds since my last weigh in post in May. I've also thought about this a rather lot and, instead of hashing through the past few months of my absence, I'm just going to move forward. I feel that if I listed all the reasons why I "fell off the wagon" it would make it easier to fall off again. It would be like building myself a crutch. The "woe is me" mentality isn't going to help because things won't necessarily get easier. So, no looking back at the past few months. They are over. I only have here and now and, God willing, tomorrow.

My big workout plan isn't so very elaborate. I'm going to walk, because it's too dreadfully hot to run for me, and do an exercise dvd 3-4 times a week. Once the weather becomes a bit milder I am anticipating adding running back into my regiment.

My eating plan is simple. Cut and count calories. My goal is to stay between 1200-1800, depending on my workout.

Now. I'm going to curl up with a book while the Mr. and Mrs. Head Cold have their way with my body.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Friday Five: foods that are not invited into my house

It's Friday.

And I am BACK!

I will have a post chronicling what I've been up to, and why I haven't been here, later. But since it's the end of the week and my first post in over 2 months I thought I would keep it light.

I'm laying here on the couch (I'm sick and my hubby's back is out so, no, I'm not in the dog house-as if that were even possible--we just need rest), trying to fall asleep after thoughtlessly drinking a cup of coffee at 8:30 p.m., and I begin to think about my day and the grocery shopping excursion. Grocery shopping by myself is beneficial because I'm not distracted by a bouncy 2 year old. However, it's also potentially hazardous, because not being distracted, I tend to veer off my grocery list and actually peruse the store. That's when the cookies, chips, candy or other crap food gets picked. Tonight went fairly well. I bought a cookie mix because Liesl loves to cook. I plan on giving the cookies away, though. That food just can't be in the house. It's just too tempting.

So, here are my top 5 foods that never need to be in my house. Because if they are, it's likely they won't see many more days.

1. Ice Cream. Oh boy. It's so yummy and creamy and sweet. My family never practiced correct portioning so a "bowl" of ice cream is just that. A bowl completely filled with ice cream. You should be able to see the ice cream over the bowl's rim. That would be my family's portion. And sometimes seconds. Just ask my husband and former roommate :) I always make Michael buy a flavor ice cream that I don't like so I won't be as tempted.

2. Sour Cream. Kind of a weird one for most people but it's been one of my biggest downfalls. If it's in the house I base my meals around it. Sour cream just makes things taste better. Like ketchup. The main difference: sour cream is soooooooooo fattening, and the reduced fat stuff just isn't the same. I'd rather go without.

3. Chips. Especially Harvest Cheddar Sunchips. I've tried portioning the serving size into little baggies so that I don't mindlessly eat out of the big bag. Fail. It doesn't matter how they're portioned out, if they're in the house they are a goner.

4.Brownie batter/chocolate chip cookie batter. No, not the actual brownies/cookies. I can handle those (usually). It's the batter that calls out to me. Seems easy enough, right? Don't buy the stuff. Well, it's gotten to the point when I finally realized brownies weren't just from a pre-packaged box (so sad it's taken me 26 years to figure that one out) and I could make my OWN mix that I had to get rid of the cocoa powder in the house. I wasn't using it for anything else so it's not a big deal, but still. Drastic measures had to be taken.

5. Ranch. :sigh: I am a condiments girl. It probably has something to do with my father feeding me ketchup off of his fingers when I was a baby. (Parents of children: please don't feed your babies ketchup off of your fingers for your own amusement. It's cute when baby sucks on your finger like it's a bottle or boob, but not when it's sucking in ketchup.Think about it. Ketchup is, for the most part sugar and, WORSE than that, high fructose corn syrup. A pure, high fructose corn syrup-less baby should stay that way for as long as possible.) I am in no way saying all of my condiment habits are linked to my first ketchup encounter, but you never know... I do digress. Ranch is a staple in our house. It's the only way I can get my husband to eat raw, green veggies; and Liesl to eat more than 1 baby carrot stick. It's not as tempting as ice cream, though.

And, an unofficial, honorary edible substance (can't really be classified as "food" b/c it's just candy- a category unto itself): Peanut Butter M&M's. I think my life would be a lot easier if Mars would just discontinue them. And all chocolate/peanut butter combinations everywhere, for that matter. (I'm talking to you Reese's) Maybe I'll petition for it. Who's with me?

There you have it. My top 5 "trigger" foods. When consumed, they leave me wanting more of them, no matter how much I've already had. Therefore, they rarely cross the front door of my house...because I bring them in the back. Ha ha. Seriously, no.

I'll be back on Monday with a real update, and then I hope to resume as usual with 'Weigh-in Wednesdays.' It should be an interesting first week back.

(and thanks to all of you who've stuck around and asked where I was. I've contemplated "giving up" on this blogging, but I will try to stick it out. Even through the ugly...more on that Monday)

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

I have had one of those weeks. One of those weeks that makes you wonder if all of your hard work is worth it, and then you decide it's not and give up.

(The broken glass is a product of a story later to come..)

That week was last week. I was so bummed about not being able to get my eating under control. I was overwhelmed and stressed with caring for my daughter by myself b/c my husband's job kept him gone longer than usual (disaster work). I was feeling like a failure because week 4 of the C25k was kicking my butt.

During my funk/craziness, I cut my hair. No, I did not get a hair cut. I took my scissors and razor and went to town on my head. In the process of cutting my hair, I broke my mirror. I didn't slam it against the wall or anything. I just stepped on it.

My guardian angel/fairy godmother came in the form of a friend who caffeinated me on Wednesday, rescued my daughter and me from our house (no car for this stay at home mommy!) for the day on Thursday and swept me away for an outing MINUS CHILD on Saturday. I try not to complain about my station and current "job" because I know so many mom's would love to be a stay at home mom, but there are times when it's just overwhelming. With only one car for our family, a tight budget (but who's isn't?) and not being within walking distance of a park or store or even friends- a girl can just go a bit stir crazy, especially with as much rain that has fallen this month! So, it was such a blessing to have an ear to hear the complaints, and know that she had been there, done that and come out on the other side. Mostly sane. ;)

My other shining light came in the form of my husband. If you know him, you'll know he's not a veggie eater. He loves pizza, bread and cheese; and has a metabolism that lets him eat that way without puffing up his body. If I ate that way? Well, we all see what happened when I did. Anyway, he told me on Friday that he wanted to do the 21 Day Daniel Fast. So, for him to say he was ready to cleanse his system of caffeine and other junk by eating nothing but veggies and fruit and drinking nothing but water was a big deal! This also provided me a great chance to refocus my energies on eating right, and the Why of it all. I admit, though, I have stuck with the "diet" aspect of this more than the "fasting" part. My goal is to make it more fasting than diet, however. I am on Day 5-and only minimal sugar cravings. A good sign, I think.


Now, to the reason for the post in first place. (took me long enough to get here!) Weigh-in. Last week, due to my funk, I actually forgot to weigh-in. I'm pretty sure last week's weigh-in would have resulted in a gain-I'm positive of that fact, actually. My clothes were fitting a bit tighter in the waist from all of the junk I had put in my body. This week? I knew there would be a loss, even with T.O.M. appearing.

Weigh-in Results: -1.4

This OFFICIALLY puts me at losing over 30 pounds so far!

I am repeating Week 4 of Couch to 5k and continuing on Level 2 of the '30 Day Shred' this week. My workouts combined with my diet changes should make for an interesting weigh-in next week...

Lastly, and least:

On the Saturday excursion, we went to an Antique Barn. These guys were soooo creepy I couldn't NOT take a picture and share it with you! I kind of want to go back and get them!

How have YOU ALL been doing???????

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Insurance and Wednesday Weigh-in

Insurance companies--bleh.

Today was supposed to be my prosthesis molding, but my insurance company has decided to give us the run around. I don't know about you but I don't have $400 set aside for my feet and the reason I HAVE insurance is for that very reason. So, instead I have to play their games and try a more "conventional method" of fixing my problem. I have to wear generic inserts which are already causing the same pain I was in before. They don't support me enough. I have to suffer through these inserts for 3 weeks, then I return to the Dr. to follow up on how they are doing.

Exercising is going to be just loads of fun these next 3 weeks...
On a happier note I weighed in today 1.6 pound less than last week! I said on Monday that I wasn't expecting much because my eating has been a bit out of control. I am pleasantly surprised by this loss. It makes me wonder what kind of weight loss I would have had if I watched what I ate, too. I guess we'll find out next week because I am determined to lose AT LEAST 1.4 pounds to round out a total of 30 pounds so far. That's my goal for next week.

Since I haven't mentioned my actual weight, I feel it's important to share something with everyone. One of the ways I track each week is by measuring. Here is a list of what I measure and how many inches I have lost since starting to track them on November 23, 2009.

Total Inches Lost
  • Right calf: - 1.5 inches
  • Right thigh: - 2 inches
  • Right upper arm: -1.5 inches
  • Bust: -4.5 inches
  • Waist: -7 inches
  • Hips: -6.5 inches
I love looking back at where I started. Sure, I have a LONG ways to go but I have already come so far! If you haven't started monitoring your progress by using something other than a scale, I strongly suggest that you do!
Monday I shared how I had been pretty lazy with preparing foods and eating healthy so I tried something new.

Tofu Lo Mein

C'mon now, you can't tell me that it doesn't look goooood!! It tasted as good as it looks, too! I never measure anything so I'll just post the ingredients with a general instruction :)

1/2 package Extra Firm Tofu
Lite Soy Sauce

100% Whole Wheat Spaghetti noodles (they're boiling in the background)
Sesame Seed Oil
Green Onions (chopped)
Carrots (finely chopped)
Lite Soy Sauce
Bit o' Sugar
Teriyaki Sauce (I only used this because I ran out of Soy)
Crushed Red Pepper Flakes (barely used these)

I marinaded the tofu for about an hour then cooked it with some oil while the noodles were boiling. I added the carrots in about 10 minutes later and let them cook while the noodles were still cooking. I added the green onions in just before I put transferred the noodles over. Then, I added the soy, sugar, teriyaki and red pepper flakes.

I used whatever veggies I had in my kitchen. Had I had green peppers, red peppers or broccoli I would have added those in. Maybe not the broccoli. I hate broccoli. But I would have added it to my daughters' plate :)

It was yummy and it has my 23 month old daughter's approval.

I hope you enjoy it!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Homekeeper's Journal: May 11

In my kitchen …….tofu lo mein, green smoothies and something using lots of lettuce!

On my mind today …… POTTY TRAINING!!! In full force! Only 1 pee accident since Friday! Now, if only I could get the little Princess to poop on the potty and not in a corner...

Something that makes me feel rather touchy …….. nothing comes to mind right now--ask me tomorrow :P

One goal for this week is ….. to make my house suitable for company at any given time. I'm not expecting any, but I don't want to miss an opportunity to fellowship because I'm ashamed of my (lack of) housekeeping.

What I’m reading …… the LOVE REVOLUTION by Joyce Meyer

One individual I am praying for ….. my husband. He's working 12 hour days, 6 days a week while taking on a different job description to aid in the Nashville Flood Relief.

I am looking forward to …… continuing the Couch to 5k training. I love running.

On the Back Burner of my mind …… wondering if my mom will ever make it up here to visit, and if Michael and I will have any house guests over the summer.

I see God moving ……. in my husband and in me, when I don't over analyze/over think everything.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Just Do It

I have been hesitating all day to blog.

Do you ever have days where you just want to hide under a rock and let the world go by? Yeah, that's me today.

I feel like I am beginning to sound like a broken record with my posts. I'm doing great, then I'm not. And exercising isn't the problem. I AM doing great there. I love to exercise! Even when I'm not motivated to exercise I still do it. It's becoming habit. I roll out of bed to walk or run most mornings without even thinking about sleeping in. Being active is not my problem.

My love/hate relationship with food is the problem. I know what foods to eat, I buy the right foods to eat, I think about eating the right foods...but I don't. It is easier to pour a bowl of cereal than make a healthy omelet, or eat a frozen pizza for lunch than prepare something healthy. And, yes, those have been my meals for the day. I have a refrigerator PACKED with healthy foods but I chose to eat processed stuff.

I haven't been motivated to eat healthy. I am by no means giving up on losing weight and becoming changing but I've come to some sort of road block. Seth at Fit with a Purpose really struck home when he made a list of what his life looked like before his weight loss journey and after. Before he ate whatever he wanted and now?? He said, "I am intentional with my eating." Yes! That is what I want.

I haven't "felt" like eating healthy. My excuses? The dishes pile up so fast when you cook instead of re-heat or order out. My husband has been working late hours and not eating dinner at home so why make big meals for just me and Liesl?

At church yesterday my pastor taught from Romans 12:1-2 about being a Living Sacrifice.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual( or reasonable) act of worship. 2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

This scripture has always convicted me. I am supposed to offer my body as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, as my act of worship. I can defile my body by what I do with it. Whether it's sexual immorality, cruel words or putting substances I know are harmful in my body. For me, I know certain foods can harm the body but I've chosen to let my feelings lead me and eat them anyway. As the pastor said yesterday, being led by feelings is a mark of immaturity. There are things that we know we have to do even when we don't feel like doing them: go to work, school, clean the house, pay the bills, etc,. Just because I don't feel like eating healthy is NOT a good enough reason. Nike said it simply, but wisely: Just Do It.

I am responsible for sacrificing myself, all of me, to God whether I feel like it or not. It is my "reasonable act of worship".

Do you struggle with staying motivated to eat healthy?? What do you do about it??

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

Today is the first weigh-in for the month of May. I was super scared when getting on the scale this morning because, although I had worked out consistently, I have been sick and while I haven't been binging, I also haven't been eating as healthy as I should. So, I stepped on the scale and had to do a double take. I am down 3.6 pounds!! This weight puts me about 15-20 pounds away from being able to fit back into MOST of my old clothes. They are still fat clothes, mind you, but they are my pre-pregnancy clothes.

Oh, I can't freakin' wait!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Birthday Vacation

Sorry for the unexplained absence last week. Monday was my birthday and my husband was on vacation last week so I decided to forgo blogging and spend more time with him. I'm sure you can understand!

As I said, last Monday was my birthday and it was a great one! I went to the podiatrist and got diagnosed with tendonitis (I knew that was coming) in my left foot AND found out that I have really high arches. For years I've been telling my husband that his feet were flat when all along it was ME that was the weird one. Go figure. I'm going to go back in a week or so to get a cast made of my foot for prosthesis. They taped my feet while I was there and it has made a huge difference in how I exercise. I can finally exercise without pain! I can only imagine how much better it will feel with the prosthesis!

I had an amazing NSV (Non-scale Victory) last week. I was able to fit into a pair of jeans that haven't fit since November 2008! Oh, boy was I excited!!

I did weigh-in on Wednesday, even though I didn't post, and it was the same as the week before. It was T.O.M. so I'm not surprised. However, I am a bit nervous about this coming Wednesday. I've had a yucky cold for the past few days that has just wiped out my energy, AND I haven't been motivated AT ALL to eat healthy. I am really struggling with binging and craving sweets. I'm not sure why. Usually I would binge when I'm upset or sad, but I haven't been either of those. My birthday was great, I finally figured out what's going on with my foot and will be able to start running once I've kicked this cold, I had an amazing NSV, and yet I am still sabotaging myself by eating crappy. Why? I wish I knew.

For the past few days I would eat unhealthy at one meal then vow to eat healthy at the next. This is the beginning of a dangerous cycle. This way of thinking is what lead me to gaining all of my pregnancy weight (and then some) back. I have to nip this thing in the big-fat butt before it gets any more out of control. Being healthy CAN and MUST start NOW, not at the next meal. I need to remember how it felt to button my jeans again, or to look in the mirror and see a wee-bitty bit of collarbone staring out at me. Because those things felt a LOT better than this mental yo-yo game going on in my head.

Here's what my last week looked like...lot of fun!

Friday, April 23, 2010

Friday Five: Earth Day

In lieu of yesterday being Earth Day, today's 5 will be what I am doing, or am trying to do, to make living less toxic for the Earth.

I haven't always been very earth friendly with the way I live. Up until recently I haven't really thought much about it. I hear about everything needing to be "greener" or "organic", and the cynical side in me thinks about how much money everyone is making by putting a "green" or "organic" label on products. However, with a toddler under my care and learning from my actions I began to think about what "going green" might really mean.

I certainly don't call what I do "going green". I like to think of it as helping the Earth. Whether you know it or not, everything you do effects the Earth and as inhabitants of this planet we have a responsibility to cultivate, maintain and protect it. Once I discovered how my actions, or lack thereof, would make an impact, I began to rethink my cynical ways.

5 easy somethings I can do to help the Earth

  • Recycle- This seems like it should be easy, right? But, oh boy... Last summer I located the closest recycling center and made weekly/bi-weekly trips. After about a month or two things began to get more complicated. It seemed like such an inconvenience. Plus, the plastic bins I kept the recyclables in began to get stinky which proved to be the last straw. I didn't want to wash out all of the cans/bottles, sort through and shred papers, break down boxes or deal with stinky, gross plastic bins all while chasing a toddler. (Way to make a case for recycling, right?) BUT, I should. I chose to turn my back on something I feel is right. It's such a small thing that can make such a big difference. I persevere this year and find a way to make recycling work for my family.

  • Buy Local- Support your local farmers and buy their produce. In return, you'll get fresher, better tasting food that hasn't traveled hundreds, sometimes thousands, of miles away. 10 Reasons to Eat Local Food

  • Plant a Garden- I suppose growing my own food has been instilled in my by my father. I remember in my early elementary school years watching my dad till up the garden and a few weeks later weeding that same garden. I always pulled up the cucumbers because I thought they were weeds. Now that I have a yard of my own, growing my own food has always been on the "to do" list. This year's 4X4 garden is fairly small (smaller than what I would like, anyway). Each year I plan on increasing it's size. And I must say how exciting it is to see my nearly 2 year old learning about seeds, dirt, plants, worms and gardening. I am so happy to share this with her. Square Foot Gardening is a great way to use the what space you have to its' fullest potential. And if you don't have a yard, use old plastic containers to grow herbs or tomato plants.

  • Composting- If you do decide to garden, composting your trash is an excellent way to feed it. And if you don't decide to garden, composting is an excellent way to feed my garden! (haha) I have had my compost trash can for a long time and finally decided to make the plunge and go for it. I am using a large rubbermaid trashcan that we bought when we first moved. I poked holes all over it to help with ventilation and, because it's round, I can mix everything together by rolling it. It takes awhile to see the results but it will be worth it. Plus, I get to look for worms with my daughter to put in the compost bin. Can you tell we love dirt? 30 Unusual Items You Can Compost

  • Homemade Cleaners- This is something very new to me. I had heard of people making their own cleaning supplies but I guess it just seemed "weird". Lo and behold, here I am wanting to make the switch. I like the idea of knowing EXACTLY what is in whatever I am using. Most cleaning products are packed with chemicals and additives that are bad for our bodies (ever checked the warning labels??) and horrible for our waters. Using lemons, vinegar, baking soda, borax and a few choice essential oils will help the environment, my health AND my wallet.

  • I've used the Christian HomeKeeper Network to find the bulk of my homemade cleaner recipes. Once my laundry detergent runs out, I plan on using this recipe to make my own laundry detergent. I am also in the research stage of making toothpaste, deodorant, facial cleanser and shampoo. Your skin is the largest organ of your body. Whatever gets put on your skin gets absorbed into your body, into your bloodstream and into your organs, as has been proven by many studies. Essentially, whatever is toxic to put in your mouth is toxic on your skin as well. Kind of a selling point for me.

The point is now that I know, I can't just do nothing. Doing one small something is better than nothing. A friend told me once that it's baby steps. Be mindful of what you buy and how that in turn will effect the planet.

Making a cleaner, healthier world has to start somewhere. A way to start is by becoming informed. There are countless websites with oodles of information. That's where I started: There are also documentaries that are truly eye opening. No Impact Man and Food Inc. will make you think.

What are some ways that you're helping the Earth?

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

Today was super busy, but super awesome, and so I am only now finding the time to write a blurb about this past week and how it altered my weight loss.

So, with an injured foot and a postponed C25k I had to find other ways of exercising. Walking would have been great this week but my husband was out of town from Sunday morning until about an hour ago. Here's what this past week looked like in workouts:

Thursday: 2 mile walk in the a.m. & C25k-week 2, day 3 in the p.m.
Friday: injured foot :(
Saturday: 25 min. outside cycling & 40 minute walk
Sunday: 30 Day Shred, Day 1
Monday: 30 Day Shred, Day 2
attempted 30 Day Shred but the top of my injured foot felt like it was being stabbed with a knife so I just did 15 minutes of strength training
Wednesday: 30 Day Shred, Day 3

Michael is back so I can resume my a.m./p.m. walks, pending any foot pain. I had not realized how much I truly enjoyed those walks until I couldn't go on them anymore. Walking for exercise just isn't the same with a toddler climbing out of the stroller.

What are the results of such a workout week? -1.2! I truly thought I would gain this week because my eating has been so off. I guess I worked hard enough to balance it out.

Well, folks...I'm heading off to watch 'Glee' on now. The ONLY two TV shows I watch, Biggest Loser and Glee, just happen to be on the same night. Rats.

I hope all of you are finding some time in the day to get outside, get active and enjoy this lovely weather!!

Sunday, April 18, 2010


I completed the 2nd week of C25k...only to aquire an injury along the way. My left foot (the already injured one) has fallen victim to yet another injury. I'm pretty sure the combination of my compensating for the old injury by overpronating (running more on the inside of my foot than normal), using worn running shoes, running on pavement and adding trail/hill work on the weekends are to blame. It could be worse, though. If I had chosen to start this weight loss journey back in December by running and then injured my foot, I most likely would have given up.

But not this time.

This journey isn't about quick fixes. It's a life change. I'm in it for life. So, although I have to take a break from running, I don't take a break from becoming healthier. I plan on cycling (even though I get bugs in my hair), walking (slower than usual, but walking is better than nothing) and continuing with different workout DVD's--most likely the '30 Day Shred'.

Plus, losing weight and becoming healthy isn't just about exercise, right? It's about eating healthy, too. I definitely don't have this one down. Since I'm throwing all this out there I should fess up. I did binge a few times this week. After I hurt my foot, I became scared. Scared of losing the progress that I'd already made. Scared I wouldn't be able to run, or even walk, for a few weeks. (It hurt that bad, people!!) Scared that I would give up and pig out to the max. Scared of shutting down and ballooning to a record high weight again. I kind of freaked. So, what then? Well, I ate some SunChips. By some, of course, I mean pretty much all. I am grateful at times like these that we (I) don't keep most junk food in the house, and that we have one car which Michael uses. I had no easy access to any other food.

My lesson?? Not learned, but learning.

I truly hate admitting this, because I've tried my hardest to hide it all my life. Yet here I am. Confessing one of my deepest sins and secrets to only God knows who. And why?? Because I need the accountability. And because sin and secrets can't live in the light. Bringing it out into the light exposes it. Sure, it makes me more vulnerable but how will I change when I keep everything to myself?

"..The light from heaven came into the world, but they (unbelieving) loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. They hate the light because the want to sin in the darkness. They stay away from the light for fear their sins will be exposed and they will be punished. But those who do what is right come to the light gladly, so everyone can see that they are doing what God wants."
John 3:19-21

This verse is where I am. I don't love food more than I love Jesus. Kind of sounds like a "duh" statement, right? However, when I hide my binging and over eating, I am afraid of being exposed. BUT when I bring all of this into the light, I am being purified of it. I am choosing God over food.

By the way...I am so encouraged by everyone I know who, after reading this blog, has decided to make their lives healthier, too! Keep up the good work. It's so difficult to change a set pattern--be it eating a certain way or not exercising--but it is worth it!!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Friday Five: Workout Songs

I am not the kind of person that can run without any kind of music. I can walk without music, especially if I'm being accompanied by a friend or it's a nature walk, but I don't like to. It's my fuel. When I want to quit (which I experienced last night on my 3rd run of the week--definitely a morning person), the right song can push me through.

Here are my current top 5 workout songs.

5. "Superfly" by the O.C. Supertones. There's nothing lyrically ground breaking about this song and ska is certainly not my preferred genre, however, this song puts a smile on my face even while huffing and puffing.

4. "The More" by Downhere. This song has a great little guitar hook, is fast paced, lyrically awesome and helps focus my thoughts Above. It's a great song, even if not listened to while running.

3."You Already Take Me There" by Switchfoot. An older favorite of mine. Listening to this one always takes me back. Plus, I ♥ Switchfoot.

2. "Undignified" by The David Crowder Band. The beat is perfect for running and the lyrics are fun but meaningful. It doesn't hurt having an awesome chant in the song.
"La la la la la
La la la la la
It's one of those chants where you just feel the need to fist punch the air on "HEY". I'm sure I look all sorts of ridiculous running and fist punching the air...

...and my top favorite workout song (drumroll, please)

1. "Fighter" by Christina Aguilera. This is my all time favorite workout song. Angry chick music. Go figure. When no other song inspires, this one does. The gist of the song is about a girl who's had the wool pulled over her eyes by her boyfriend and, instead of holding a grudge, she learns her lesson and comes out on the other side stronger.

"Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter

Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter."

It's easy to listen to these lyrics and relate it to running/becoming healthier/losing weight, and then push through a rough spot in my workout. The only problem I always run into is wanting to sing along! I suppose that would really build up my lungs!

If you haven't notice, I have no new music in my favorites. It's not that I don't like new music. Music just doesn't seem to have the same priority it had before Liesl was born. I'm not proud of that, but it is what it is.

So, tell me...what are your favorite workout songs???

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

This morning I took to the streets for Day 2, Week 2 of the C25k. Can I just say how much I LOVE seeing the sunrise while running? Seeing the sun peak over the horizon and make everything glow is just amazing.

Today's run was more challenging than Monday's. I went for a walk last night and my left foot was feeling great so I walked at a faster pace. When I woke up this morning I knew today's run would be hard. I took some ibuprofen before leaving to run. It was truly painful to even walk on it, but after the second run I didn't feel any pain. I should have known better than to push myself last night. I am still needing to find that balance between pushing myself and holding back.

And now to the weigh in...

-2.4 pounds!

It's roughly the same as last week, only this week I feel the difference. Does that make sense? My clothes fit a bit looser around the waist and I am seeing more of my collarbones (yes, I think I may have a slight collarbone obsession...they've been "hiding" for so long it's like discovering a new body part). This 2 pound deficit also put my weight at a different tenth digit. I don't think I'm going to reveal my weight, though. I am working on before pictures so the after pictures will have their true effect. More on those some other time.

I received disturbing family news yesterday. I am not at liberty to discuss it but it's already begun to test my resolve. After I heard the news, all I could think about was getting to McDonald's and slurping down a supersize sweet tea..or eating something, anything, mindlessly. Luckily, this house is stocked with nothing but healthy foods so I would have to leave the get the junk food. I didn't. I wanted to. Really bad. Instead of turning to food, where should I turn?? To the only Food the truly satisfies, the only Water that truly quenches. I am still learning to turn to God instead of food. I'm not there yet, but I am learning.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Pants on the Ground vs. Wedgies

I just completed Day 1, Week 2 of the C25k program.Whew. I had hyped myself up over the weekend by thinking it was going to be brutal. When my phone's alarm clock went off at 5:30 a.m., there was no hesitation at hitting the snooze on it. My husband said something to me about getting up and running--I think it was supposed to be encouraging but all I wanted to do was hit him for talking while I was trying to snooze 15 minutes longer. Snoozing more just wasn't in the plan this morning. I found out that my new phone was set to repeat alarm every 5 minutes. Evil.

10 minutes later I was dressed, laced and ready to go. Ipod and phone in hand, I went out to face the chilly morning air. After my 5 minute warm-up walk, I began my first 90 second run. The run, itself, went well. I did have wardrobe malfunctions. Actually, I thought my running attire wouldn't pose another problem but it's a recap.
..(Warning: a bit of TMI)

Wednesday's run: I had to hold my pants up during the first 60 seconds. They were falling off. During the 90 second walk, I tied the drawstring so tight that it left a lovely ring around my waist. Even with the drawstring tied tight they needed to be held up.

Friday's run: Different pants, no drawstring. The first 60 seconds had my underwear falling around my hips and my pants sliding down with them. AHHHH! I'm sure it looked pretty ridiculous to passerby's. During the 90 second walk, I pulled my underwear up and found the only way to keep them up during a run was to impose on my self a wedgie. Yes, I just went there. My pants were similar. No drawstring=Urkel style pants. At least my shirt was covering them up!

Today's run: I was optimistic. I bought smaller size underwear this weekend and I was wearing my favorite, very worn, grey, capri, drawstring pants. I hadn't adjusted the drawstring since the beginning of March, so I should have expected what was to come. Friday's mishaps repeated themselves. Self-imposed wedgie and really tight drawstring.

(End TMI)

Lesson learned. I need proper running attire. My old workout clothes just aren't going to cut it anymore. Sure, they are great for a DVD workout or walking, but running requires a little more. Good thing I have a birthday in a few weeks ;) I, also, think that cotton on cotton can prove to be a disastrous pant/underwear combination.

And, for those of you driving to work around 5:45-6:30 a.m. in my area, I am so sorry if you had to witness any of that! I promise it won't happen again....until the next time it does.

I headed out on Saturday a.m. with my camera in hand to capture the beautiful sunrise. This is one reason why running/walking in the early hours is completely worth it.

In case of collapsing while running, I am within a half a mile from a hospital. Ha.

Any good running wardrobe advice????

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Friday Five: Musicals

Okay, folks. I'm going to be straight with you. I totally stole this idea from a fellow blogger. She's the smarty pants behind this idea. I always love reading little tidbits about people. The 'Friday Five' will, hopefully, be a way to share a little more of myself-sans weight loss struggles.

I'm starting off small and light this Friday. If you already know me-know me, you can probably just come back next for the next post :)

Musicals aren't everyone's favorite but I LOVE them! So, here are my favorite 5 Musicals:

1. The Sound of Music

I mean, c'mon. Of course this is my favorite musical. My daughter's named after one of the characters! I've loved this musical since well before I can remember. When I am in an exceptionally good mood I find myself singing "The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Music". It just naturally comes out of me. Love it.

2. My Fair Lady
Eliza Doolittle puts a smile on my face.

3. The King and I

This musical isn't in my top 5 for it's musical quality. I actually find the songs lacking and skip past the slow ones :) I like the story and find the king very entertaining--but the real reason why it's in my top 5? My favorite dress is the one Anna wears to the dinner. When the wives lift their dresses (with no undergarments) to hide from the man with "head of a goat" and the "evil eye", I crack up. Every single time.

4. Fiddler on the Roof

I really wish I was related Tevye. Can you imagine how fun family gatherings would be? Hilarious.

5. Mary Poppins
Or "Pop Pop", as Liesl calls it. I just love Julie Andrews. And most people love Mary Poppin's lace up shoes, too. Oh, not me. I want a pair of the purple shoes she pulls our of her carpet bag! I wonder if they come in a size 12...

I think I might just walk around singing songs from musicals all day now.

Off to complete Day 3, Week 1 of C25k!......What's your favorite musical???

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wednesday Weigh-in

Day 2, Week 1 of the Couch to 5k program is completed! Only one more day to go this week and I must say that this is more challenging than the LCW DVD program. It's not that it's more strenuous but it leaves more days open for me to chose what to do. You would think that would be very freeing but I like routine and "having a plan". The C25k is a plan but what about the other days of the week?? Yoga, biking, LCW, dancing, another random DVD...? The possibilities are endless and if I don't have it already planned out in my head, or on paper, it just isn't going to happen. Like yesterday. Not a good workout day. I went for a 35 minute walk and did about 10-12 minutes of strengthening while watching 'The Biggest Loser' but it wasn't nearly as much effort as I've put into my body in the past few weeks. Oh, well. One more thing to add to the to do list-Planning!

The results are in. I am -2 pounds this week. I definitely am feeling more like a turtle than a hare. Slowly, but steadily, the weight is coming off. With as much as I have to lose, though, it just seems like I should be able to drop weight a little faster. Watching shows, like 'The Biggest Loser', can be encouraging and lead you to push harder but it can also lead to unrealistic expectations. Like losing 9 pounds in a week. Every other week. Since starting this journey the most I've lost in 1 week was 5 pounds. It was at the beginning of this journey so I'm sure a lot of it was water weight. It would be nice to have those big losses again. Any thoughts?????

And, now, here is a blurb about an inspiration of mine. This person started changing my life in September of 2007. She is one of my motivations to keep on pushing because I know my efforts for myself will benefit her, too. She changed the way I see the world and the way I see myself. Because of her, I want to be better. She is my daughter. My sweet, fun-spirited, contagiously happy 22 month old little girl. Motherhood hasn't been easy-I'm sure it's only going to get harder, but I am learning so much about myself by being a mother. I am finding that I want to eat healthier because I want her to eat healthier. I love it that she wants a salad every time I eat one, and squats down to "cise" (exercise). Of course, she's changed much more in me and I aim to teach her a lot more, but I want her to respect her body and take care of herself. I don't want her to have the same struggles that I have had. Food will not be a reward, but fuel. Exercise will be fun and a way of life, not a drudgery. This is what I hope to teach, and how I aspire to live.

(she's not passed out, just "sleeping" after gardening with me)

Who inspires you?? Who motivates you to live healthier, and go that extra mile??

Monday, April 5, 2010


C25K looks like a bunch of gibberish BUT it stands for "Couch to 5k" which is what I've decided to make my next endeavor. And I won't be doing it alone. JewliaGoulia started her C25K and invited people to join along. It will be great to have the support and have a community of newbies to running. Join us if you've ever thought about running but were to shy, scared, self-conscious, unmotivated, nervous or thought you were to out of shape to do it. What have you got to lose?

After 5ish weeks of the 'Last Chance Workout' DVD, I am calling it quits. It's not that it isn't fun. I still enjoy it, but it takes up an hour of Liesl's naptime. Oh, who am I kidding? I just want to RUN! I'd rather RUN than stay inside and finish up a DVD which, by the way, is to blame for aggravating an old injury in my foot. I haven't done the cardio portion since Thursday but added in running, bike riding, more walking while continuing with the 'LCW' strengthening, and my foot doesn't hurt nearly as bad as before. Yay!

But does this mean that I didn't complete yet another goal I set??? Yeah, I guess so. I think I stuck with it long enough to see the benefits I would gain. However, I was beginning to dread Liesl's nap time just because I knew I would have to do the workout, and I knew it would wipe me out for the rest of the day b/c of my foot. I even began keeping Liesl up longer than usual to avoid it. Eeek! That's a sure sign it's time for a change! I may pull it out on a rainy day because it is a fantastic workout; but that's the beauty of DVD's!

In addition to changing my workout, I've also changed my weigh in day. Wednesday is now the lucky winner. I think it will give my body a chance to rebound from the weekend.

Off to tend to the garden now...

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Ding Ding Ding

Sorry for the lack of consistent updates. I have been recovering from being sick...again. Thank-you, daughter of mine, for kind.

Last week I had a green smoothie most mornings so, by the end of the week you would think that I would feel great. Not. I had a headache the size of Texas, I was nauseated (no, I am not pregnant, thank-you very much), I was breaking out on my face and craving all the wrong foods. I assumed all of these symptoms were PMS related (TMI? Sorry.) so I gave into my cravings knowing that they would only last for a day or 2. By "giving in", I consumed homemade pizza, reese's bunnies, ice cream and m&m's. Not all in the same day and not the entire quantity but enough to counter effect my hard work from the previous days.

The calendar doesn't lie. It's way too early to be having these symptoms. I didn't put two and two together until about 1 hour ago. I returned from my morning walk and had a monster of a headache. "Not again," I thought. I had also noticed yesterday that my face was breaking out again, too. Surely this isn't PMS. Then, I thought about my green smoothie breakfast and


Of course, I've experienced this before when I was on a Raw Food diet before Liesl was born. D-E-T-O-X. Moodiness. Break outs. Nausea. Headaches. Sugary, high fat food cravings. It all makes sense. Unlike last week, I'm not "giving in". I'm going to stick out the side effects because in 2-4 days, they'll be gone and I'll be healthier.

Back to last week, my binge episode, that I'm not proud of btw, effected my weigh-in. I did lose 1 pound but I put in a heck of a workout week that 1 pound could have been a lot more. I can't change the past though, can I? I fell to temptation, repented and, by grace alone, I am still standing.

I have decided to incorporate running back into the exercise regime. It's time. I've been walking for a few weeks along with the LCW DVD so I am ready. Because I've been sick, my 6 week DVD program is turning into more a 7- 7 and a half week program. But I'm okay with that. I will complete it even if it's not in the amount of time suggested. As for running, M-W-F seems to be a good start. I'm also not going to start any kind of "formal" training/program for running until I am finished with the DVD. I'm still not sure which, if any, DVD I will try next. I may just focus on running and do a workout DVD on the side..who knows..

Until we meet again..

...enjoy spring!

Thursday, March 25, 2010


Yesterday started out great. I went for a 2 mile walk, did laundry, cleaned up the kitchen, edited some photos and some other stuff all before 8 am. I made my green smoothie and put the tofu fajita marinade in the refrigerator. Liesl played inside, we read some books and I did another load of dishes (oh yea, 2 was bad). Then, around 9:30 I became soooo hungry. So, I snacked on some string cheese, but that just wasn't cutting it. When lunch finally came, I was famished. I made the tofu fajitas and had one...and then half of another. I jotted down the calories and frowned. It's sometimes easier to just buy pre-packed stuff because then you know exactly how many calories are in it. I hate doing the math of adding up all of the calories while I'm cooking. Well, looking at the calories for the fajitas was disappointing--I guess I never looked at the calories in the tortillas I buy, just the price.

130 calories for 1 tortilla? really????

After the damage had been done, I put my grumpy, fussy, whiny toddler to bed and debated working out for 20 minutes. Seriously, I sat on the couch and thought about it. I knew I would be starting Week 5 of the 'LCW' and I had a headache creeping up on me. I chose to rest and watch 'New Moon'. Sounds like an okay plan, yeah? Well, had I just rested and not let my appetite get in the way, sure. But sitting with idle hands while watching a movie isn't something I usually do. Sometimes I knit or browse the net or entertain a toddler but not today. Nope. I was distracted by a certain tooth. The sweet tooth. I was craving something sweet..or fattening..or just plain bad for me. I came *this close* to busting into Liesl's Easter peeps but instead pigged out on her gummy treats. 6 packs to be exact. Looking back on it I wonder, "How in the world could I do that?" It's like something in my brain "clicked" and I went into auto mode and turned into an all consuming, food monster. All consuming because it didn't stop there. I heated up some of the alfredo I made earlier in the week and had crackers and alfredo sauce. Boy, do I regret not working out at lunch yesterday! I have became used to exercising during Liesl's nap so having all of that extra time on my hands was...overwhelming. It left me with myself and with a temptation that I haven't had in awhile. The temptation to just say "screw it" and eat whatever I want, whether it's good for me or not, or whether I'm even truly hungry.

But I have to pick myself up again. I can't stop here and continue this harmful way of life. It will lead to an early grave, for sure. More than even that, it's about freedom. I want to be free of this desire to eat and eat and eat, and there is only One Way to true freedom.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

good golly..

miss molly!! I am sore! Between the 'Last Chance Workout' DVD, walking every morning and breaking ground for my garden I would say I have truly put in my fair share of exercise. As a result, I am 2 pounds lighter! Woo! I counted my calories starting Thursday of last week and managed to succeed in keeping them between 1200-1500 most days. I walked 5 days out of 7 and am noticing that it is time for a tennis shoe upgrade!! I have had these sneakers since 07'and they are beginning to feel that old. I have an old injury in one of my feet that is proving to be a real nuisance. Hopefully getting new shoes will help in the remedy.

This is one of my favorite foods: Green Smoothie! This particular one is made with kale, banana, frozen unsweetened peaches and a bit of O.J. It has roughly 250 calories and is one heck of an energy boost! It also has the stamp of approval from my 21 month old. I am going to try to eat one "raw" meal a day this week--probably in the form of this smoothie. I urge you to try one. I use a blender for mine. Kale can be kind of tough to break up but if I put just the kale and O.J. in the blender first and let it go while I get the other ingredients together it helps.

Does anyone else have any awesome smoothie recipes???

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Tuesday Update

This post should really be 'Monday Mark' but due to complications it is once again being posted on Tuesday.

The 'Last Chance Workout' DVD is kicking my bottom...and my triceps..and my quads...and pretty much every other muscle in my body. I am officially half-way through, though. And I think I'm going to make it. But I've had my doubts this week. Yesterday was probably the hardest yet. I weighed in yesterday morning and balled. Poor Michael was welcomed home to a train wreck. After all the hard work I put in the scale only budged .8 of a pound. Luckily mid-day I was coming to terms with what my body is doing. I not only up'd the workout this week but changed a bit of my diet, too. More protein and fewer carbs. I've done this before but always forget what it does to my body. I haven't struggled with symptoms of my IBS since after Liesl was born and this week was a reminder of what life used to be. Without going into many more details, after the light bulb moment I did what I could to fix the problem. I weighed in again this morning and found the scale to be 2 pounds less than yesterday. My body just can't function without a certain number of carbs.

2 pounds is great..and I'll take it, but with as hard as I worked out it just doesn't seem like enough. The inches, though, are great. 1/2 inch in my upper arm, calf and thigh and 2 inches in my waist (this a.m., not yesterday). I am starting to feel more of my jaw line when I put lotion on my face and I can see the faintest line of a collar bone...sometimes. BUT, I am still not satisfied. Last week on the Biggest Loser, they sent the contestants to work 8 hours a day for 5 days and set an opening and closing time on the gym. What does that mean? More of a normal life schedule. It was amazing to see the effort they put in everyday. They would exercise in the a.m., go to work and come home to exercise...AGAIN. If they can workout 2 times a day AND go to work, why can't I? I'm a stay at home mom and I have those options right now. So, I've decided to add a 2 mile (ish) walk into my daily routine, either in the a.m. or p.m. I got it in yesterday at Lies'sl nap time because Michael was home. Today is my "rest" day from the LCW DVD but I still plan on walking. Not only am I adding more exercise, but I am going to actively watch my calories. Last week I changed the diet, but didn't truly count the calories. Yesterday I did and was shocked at how easily the amount crept up. I easily surpassed the amount I aimed for. I am going to try to keep the calories between 1200-1500. That was my goal yesterday and I'm pretty sure I got around 1800.

I would LOVE to see a 5 pound decrease next weigh-in..and I think it's more than attainable.

Half way through with the DVD is making me think: What the heck am I going to do next? I love the mixing of the strength training and cardio but I'm not sure what to turn to. I think I might need a break from Jillian. I love her, but something new would be great. I've checked out 'The Firm' and it seems to follow the HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) plan, but it's a bit pricey. If anyone has any suggestions for great workout DVD's, I'm open!