Gummies

Yesterday started out great. I went for a 2 mile walk, did laundry, cleaned up the kitchen, edited some photos and some other stuff all before 8 am. I made my green smoothie and put the tofu fajita marinade in the refrigerator. Liesl played inside, we read some books and I did another load of dishes (oh yea, 2 loads..it was bad). Then, around 9:30 I became soooo hungry. So, I snacked on some string cheese, but that just wasn't cutting it. When lunch finally came, I was famished. I made the tofu fajitas and had one...and then half of another. I jotted down the calories and frowned. It's sometimes easier to just buy pre-packed stuff because then you know exactly how many calories are in it. I hate doing the math of adding up all of the calories while I'm cooking. Well, looking at the calories for the fajitas was disappointing--I guess I never looked at the calories in the tortillas I buy, just the price.

130 calories for 1 tortilla? really????

After the damage had been done, I put my grumpy, fussy, whiny toddler to bed and debated working out for 20 minutes. Seriously, I sat on the couch and thought about it. I knew I would be starting Week 5 of the 'LCW' and I had a headache creeping up on me. I chose to rest and watch 'New Moon'. Sounds like an okay plan, yeah? Well, had I just rested and not let my appetite get in the way, sure. But sitting with idle hands while watching a movie isn't something I usually do. Sometimes I knit or browse the net or entertain a toddler but not today. Nope. I was distracted by a certain tooth. The sweet tooth. I was craving something sweet..or fattening..or just plain bad for me. I came *this close* to busting into Liesl's Easter peeps but instead pigged out on her gummy treats. 6 packs to be exact. Looking back on it I wonder, "How in the world could I do that?" It's like something in my brain "clicked" and I went into auto mode and turned into an all consuming, food monster. All consuming because it didn't stop there. I heated up some of the alfredo I made earlier in the week and had crackers and alfredo sauce. Boy, do I regret not working out at lunch yesterday! I have became used to exercising during Liesl's nap so having all of that extra time on my hands was...overwhelming. It left me with myself and with a temptation that I haven't had in awhile. The temptation to just say "screw it" and eat whatever I want, whether it's good for me or not, or whether I'm even truly hungry.

But I have to pick myself up again. I can't stop here and continue this harmful way of life. It will lead to an early grave, for sure. More than even that, it's about freedom. I want to be free of this desire to eat and eat and eat, and there is only One Way to true freedom.

good golly..

miss molly!! I am sore! Between the 'Last Chance Workout' DVD, walking every morning and breaking ground for my garden I would say I have truly put in my fair share of exercise. As a result, I am 2 pounds lighter! Woo! I counted my calories starting Thursday of last week and managed to succeed in keeping them between 1200-1500 most days. I walked 5 days out of 7 and am noticing that it is time for a tennis shoe upgrade!! I have had these sneakers since 07'and they are beginning to feel that old. I have an old injury in one of my feet that is proving to be a real nuisance. Hopefully getting new shoes will help in the remedy.


This is one of my favorite foods: Green Smoothie! This particular one is made with kale, banana, frozen unsweetened peaches and a bit of O.J. It has roughly 250 calories and is one heck of an energy boost! It also has the stamp of approval from my 21 month old. I am going to try to eat one "raw" meal a day this week--probably in the form of this smoothie. I urge you to try one. I use a blender for mine. Kale can be kind of tough to break up but if I put just the kale and O.J. in the blender first and let it go while I get the other ingredients together it helps.

Does anyone else have any awesome smoothie recipes???

Tuesday Update

This post should really be 'Monday Mark' but due to complications it is once again being posted on Tuesday.

The 'Last Chance Workout' DVD is kicking my bottom...and my triceps..and my quads...and pretty much every other muscle in my body. I am officially half-way through, though. And I think I'm going to make it. But I've had my doubts this week. Yesterday was probably the hardest yet. I weighed in yesterday morning and balled. Poor Michael was welcomed home to a train wreck. After all the hard work I put in the scale only budged .8 of a pound. Luckily mid-day I was coming to terms with what my body is doing. I not only up'd the workout this week but changed a bit of my diet, too. More protein and fewer carbs. I've done this before but always forget what it does to my body. I haven't struggled with symptoms of my IBS since after Liesl was born and this week was a reminder of what life used to be. Without going into many more details, after the light bulb moment I did what I could to fix the problem. I weighed in again this morning and found the scale to be 2 pounds less than yesterday. My body just can't function without a certain number of carbs.

2 pounds is great..and I'll take it, but with as hard as I worked out it just doesn't seem like enough. The inches, though, are great. 1/2 inch in my upper arm, calf and thigh and 2 inches in my waist (this a.m., not yesterday). I am starting to feel more of my jaw line when I put lotion on my face and I can see the faintest line of a collar bone...sometimes. BUT, I am still not satisfied. Last week on the Biggest Loser, they sent the contestants to work 8 hours a day for 5 days and set an opening and closing time on the gym. What does that mean? More of a normal life schedule. It was amazing to see the effort they put in everyday. They would exercise in the a.m., go to work and come home to exercise...AGAIN. If they can workout 2 times a day AND go to work, why can't I? I'm a stay at home mom and I have those options right now. So, I've decided to add a 2 mile (ish) walk into my daily routine, either in the a.m. or p.m. I got it in yesterday at Lies'sl nap time because Michael was home. Today is my "rest" day from the LCW DVD but I still plan on walking. Not only am I adding more exercise, but I am going to actively watch my calories. Last week I changed the diet, but didn't truly count the calories. Yesterday I did and was shocked at how easily the amount crept up. I easily surpassed the amount I aimed for. I am going to try to keep the calories between 1200-1500. That was my goal yesterday and I'm pretty sure I got around 1800.

I would LOVE to see a 5 pound decrease next weigh-in..and I think it's more than attainable.

Half way through with the DVD is making me think: What the heck am I going to do next? I love the mixing of the strength training and cardio but I'm not sure what to turn to. I think I might need a break from Jillian. I love her, but something new would be great. I've checked out 'The Firm' and it seems to follow the HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) plan, but it's a bit pricey. If anyone has any suggestions for great workout DVD's, I'm open!

Monday (ish) Mark

I had every intention of posting yesterday but as I sat at the computer around 8 p.m. my eyelids began to droop and I chose the bed over blog.

Yesterday was weigh in and measurement check day. I must say that after putting in a full 6 days of workouts I am disappointed. The scale was only 1 pound lighter. 1 pound...really??? Folks, I have been so sore all week long and to only have the scale budge one measly pound is a let down. I am trying to think positively, though, and look at the circumstances. Circumstance: I am female--and water retention is pretty normal during part of the month. I suppose I'll truly find out how much next Monday!

On a more positive note, my hips are shrinking! I haven't lost inches in my hips since the end of November, even with losing weight, but I have lost an inch and a half this past week. Woo hoo! Only a bazillion more to go! ;)

Post Workout Glow is a post every month or so by one of the blogs I enjoy reading. She challenges people to be take a picture of yourself after your workout. Doing this "proves to themselves they are beautiful when they take care of themselves. They glow when they allow their body to be the healthy functioning machine it is." And while I don't necessarily feel beautiful after a workout, I like the picture because it shows how freakin' hard I worked. Do the same for yourself. Even if you don't show it to the world you can keep it as proof of your hard work when you're retaining water! :)

Goals

I love making goals. I frequently ponder new possibilities for goals. Occasionally, I write them down. Yet very few are ever reached. With weight loss, I believe having goals are very essential. I have always made the mistake of just using numbers. "I am going to be ###, by 00/00/0000. " My goals are usually ambitious and, while at the time of making them I am completely motivated and focused, I often get discouraged when life happens, I eat too much, get sick, injured, it's a Monday, I'm having a bad hair day..blah blah blah. Whatever the reason, the goal isn't met.

Problem: unrealistic expectations.

Do I really need to set a date on a goal weight? Yeah, sure, if I have 20 pounds to drop. But with such a massive undertaking as mine, baby steps are called for. And maybe. Just maybe the goals don't even need to involve counting pounds. Recording my weight is necessary but using it as a goal may be a mistake. Instead, perhaps making short range goals, mid-range goals and ultimate goals are the tickets. And what do you know...I happen to have some already made...

Short Range Goals
*Finish 'Last Chance Workout' DVD Program
*Run 5 minutes consecutively
*Eat a veggie/fruit with every meal
*Be mindful of calories consumed
*Continue blogging my 'Monday Mark'
*Lose 5 inches in my waist
*Hike twice a month

Mid-Range Goals
*Run 1o minutes consecutively
*Have 2 vegetarian days per week
*Fit into clothes I already own
*Go on a day hike
*Find a workout/weight loss buddy
*Run a mile
*Run a 5K
*Cut out all processed foods (perhaps this is a long term goal..not sure)
*Be able to wear my wedding rings (for those wondering why I don't wear them, I can't..haven't been able to since the 2nd trimester of pregnancy with Liesl)

Long Range Goals
*Run a half marathon
*Hike the Grand Canyon (I want to do this for my 30th birthday)
*Buy all new clothes because the ones I have don't fit :)
*Have a waist measuring less than 35inches (ultimately less, but this or less is healthiest for preventing heart disease and diabetes)

I have a goal weight and I have weight loss goals but if I focus on the number instead of the overall health of my body then I am missing out on celebrating all of the other "non scale" victories. And I want to celebrate as much as possible!

Tomorrow is weigh in day...see you then!

Monday Mark

After faithfully following 5 days of the LCW DVD, I woke up Saturday at 4 am with a fire in my throat. It was so bad that I got dressed and headed out to Walmart to purchase throat lozenges. I have never seen Walmart so empty! Seriously, if you want peace and quiet while shopping there, go at 4 am.

I know where and who this virus came from. Michael had it starting last Thursday and ending on Sunday, Liesl got it this Thursday and, since I apparently think I'm immune to sickness, I was giving her smooches despite the fact her nose was running like a faucet. Given the short life of this bug, I'm on my way to recovery. :) The LCW DVD program has a 6 day workout routine, but I'm going to give myself a break this week and only do 5. Maybe. Let's see how I feel today at lunch.

I have already lost 4 of the 5 pounds I gained back! I may have even dropped that last one had I been able to function yesterday. Also, compared to my last measurements in January, I've lost around 1/2 to 1 in. Basically, this means that I'm back to where I left off...and I'll take it!